As I advance further into my middle years, my business idea, “Rent a Dirty Uncle Stan TM” may now be practical.
This is a service for folks who are sadly deprived of that essential element at any family gathering, a sleazy, loud, sexist and disreputable uncle.
You know the guy. He drinks the free booze. He can eat a dry cracker and still somehow end up with sticky blobs on his shirtfront or perhaps on his loud checked jacket. He tries to feel up the bridesmaids. He makes an inappropriate speech. He leers.
Every wedding needs one. If only to throw out.
Or why not try our Tipsy Aunt MargeTM. One sherry and she’s anyones.

Also pictured, the Crazy CousinTM, (out on a day pass from the Home for Special People).
Our staff are waiting for your call.